Dead Celebrities: For Each of These, the Train Has left the Station . . .

VoodooDoll

Let’s all be grateful the Drug Cartels are looking out for us

Maybe you haven’t noticed, but celebrities with more money than brain-power have been dropping like flies over the years. CPR – which, as we explain in our book “The Paramedic Heretic” pretty much doesn’t work on anybody – didn’t work on them, either. For your edification, here are but a few entertainment movers & shakers who allowed “healthcare” to lure them into early gravesites:

Prince

His real name was Prince Rogers Nelson, and we were on a first-name basis

  • Prince, 57, musician
  • Corey Haim, 38, actor
  • Brittany Murphy, 32, actress
  • Lesley Carter, 25, actress
Carrie Fisher

Carrie Fisher’s unexpected drug-death killed her mother, Debbie Reynolds too, the very next day. Reynolds died of a bleed in her brain and a break of her heart

  • Carrie Fisher, 60, Star Wars Princess Leia
  • Gidget Gein, 39, musician
  • Peaches Geldof, 25, fashion model
  • Lisa Robin Kelly, 43, actress
  • Bobby Hatfield, 63, Righteous Brothers vocalist
18th Annual Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame

Bobby Hatfield & Bill Medley. The Righteous Brothers vocals were called “Blue-eyed Soul” for good reason

  • Heath Ledger, 28, actor
  • John Pinette, 50, actor
  • Anna Nicole Smith, 39, former Playmate of the Year
  • Michael Jackson, 50, singer
  • Amy Winehouse, 27, musician
  • Steve Bechler, 23, Baltimore Orioles pitcher
  • Vic Chesnutt, 45, musician
  • Greg Geraldo, 44, comedian
  • James “Ultimate Warrior” Hellwig, 54, professional wrestler
  • Corey Monteith, 31, actor
  • Amy Tryon, 42, Olympic equestrian team
  • Brian Adams, 38, singer/songwriter
  • Bridgette Andersen, 22, actress
Whitney Houston & Daughter Christina

Whitney Houston and Bobby Christina. Like mom, like daughter – drugs + bathtubs = naked dead women 

  • Matthew Ansara, 35, actor, bodybuilder
  • Erica Blasberg, 28, professional golfer
  • John Belushi, 36, comedian
  • Len Bias, 23, basketball player
  • Elisa Bridges, 28, Playboy Playmate

 

KEN CAMINITI

With talent to burn

 

  • Ken Caminiti, 42, baseball player
  • Andy Irons, 32, professional surfer
  • Christopher Bowman, 40, figure skater
  • Lisa Robin Kelly, 43, actress
  • Brian Epstein, 34, entertainment manager
  • Chris Farley, 33, comedian
Thomas Kincade.png

They called Thomas Kincade “The Painter of Light”

  • Thomas Kincade, 54, artist
  • Adrienne Nicole Martin, 27, model
  • Paul DeMayo, 37, bodybuilder
  • Eric Douglas, 36, actor, comedian
Danny Gans

Very funny and extremely talented on stage

  • Danny Gans, 52, Las Vegas entertainer
  • Margaux Hemingway, 42, model
  • Chris Kelly, 34, musician
  • Derek Boogaard, 28, professional ice hockey player
Billy Mays

They said the man could sell sand in the desert and ice cubes in Alaska

 

  • Billy Mays, 51, TV salesperson
  • Michael Carl Baze, 24, horse jockey
  • River Phoenix, 23, actor
  • Dana Plato, 34, actress
  • Freddie Prinze, 22, actor, comedian
  • Rachel Roberts, 36, actress
  • Whitney Houston, 48, singer
  • Phillip Seymour Hoffman, 46, actor
Phillip Seymour Hoffman

Phillip Seymour Hoffman: One phenomenal actor

  • Mitch Hedberg, 37, comedian
  • Anissa Jones, 18, child actress
Elvis Presley

He could out-sing and out-rock everything, but the 20 pills a day and his drug-dealing MD

  • Elvis Presley, 42, The “King” of Rock & Roll

 

The only question worth asking at this point? Who’ll be the drug cartels’ next famous victims? Stay tuned, because just like the Doritos commercial says, “they’ll make more!”

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