The Strange Case of Doctor Nomophobe: You’re More Like Him Than You Think

Our cell phone obsessive behavior is rapidly approaching the status of a mental disorder.

Dr Frank Ryan

Dr Frank Ryan

So we have a brand new word now. Yep. Nomophobia.  What, never heard of it? Trust us. You will. It’s a real word. It’s one we didn’t need at all back in the old days – like as ridiculously far back as . . . oh, 2010. And I can promise you this: it ain’t going away.

NO – (as in “no”) MO – (for “mobile phone” of course) – PHOBIA. yeah, you guessed it. Chances are, you already have it. The “disease” I mean.

Nomophobia is yet another term we American nitwits need to create, in order to keep up with our mental disorders. You see, nomophobia allows us to accommodate our ever-expanding litany of freak-outs. In this case, the growing tendency to panic, in today’s world, over the fear of being without mobile phone contact, for more than maybe 5 seconds.

And the percentage of the population who are full-on, dyed-in-the-wool nomophobics already is exploding into a modern day, societal mind-bend.

Among high school and college students, for example, one can surmise that 75% already will tell us they sense a very palpable emotional reaction, whenever their cell phones are out of reach for more than a few minutes.

A recent survey revealed that many college students now shower with their cell phones. You betcha. Right there in the rain closet – just to the left of the soap. You just never know when you might miss an important call, like . . . maybe from the White House. Gotta be ready at all times. If President Obama’s personal text ever asks, “dude, wher u at?” – well then, you’ll be able to report to POTUS the status of your hygiene routine. National Security might need to know. You could be on the bathtub watch list.

Typical teenagers report they would rather lose a finger than a cell phone.

A Cosmo poll revealed half of the females under 20 surveyed, said it’s cell phone first, boyfriend second – when escaping a burning building. Priorities, you know.

An ever-growing number of us would far rather text or Tweet, than actually have to “talk” – you know, as in communicate the way humans always have – with friends.

Nomophobia is everywhere. The word itself was coined in England six years ago, when a study found even back then, 54% of mobile phone users in Britain became extremely anxious when their batteries die, or they temporarily lose their network signal.

The study sampled more than 2,000 Brits – most of whom reported that keeping in touch with friends or family was the main reason that they got anxious when they could not use their mobile phones. The study compared stress levels induced by the average case of nomophobia to be on par with wedding day jitters and surgery.

Since those little studies – in America, anyway – the situation has grown far worse.

Three teenage girls so far, have murdered their mothers, after being grounded and having their cell phones taken. Three. Murders.

76% – 3 out of every 4 people you see in the mall – sleep next to their smart phones. Among high school and college students, it’s more likely 90%.

35% confessed to answering their cell phone during intimate times with their significant other. One in five people would rather go without shoes for a week than take a break from their phone. That’s called trading your soul for soles.

More than half of us never turn our phones off.

So, we surmise 75% of all of us suffer from nomophobia, and soon it will be 90%.

Our own personal guiding light is this: technology should be our slave, and not the other way around. So here’s your ever-so-simple, have-a-happy-weekend, test:

Go into your bedroom in the morning. Toss your cell phone onto the middle of your big soft bed. Leave. Go live your day, for God sakes.

When you get back to the room at night for bedtime – check your messages. Easy.

Because if you can’t even do that – You’re already a goner.


In keeping with the basic premise of our website, after all, here’s a story that kind of sums it all up:

Meanwhile, a Deadly Doctor Pratfall 6 Years Ago This Summer . . .

It was mid-August, 2010 when Doctor Frank Ryan, the well-known cosmetic surgeon in Hollywood, decided he was smart enough to do a little texting while maneuvering his Jeep along a Malibu cliff. Unfortunately, he wasn’t. Los Angeles Police investigators later informed the Ryan family that at the time of his death, the famous physician was Tweeting out comments about his dog as he rounded some pretty treacherous curves.

You just can’t make this stuff up. Well, actually we could. But with all the tweeked  physician misbehavior going on . . . why would we have to?

Ryan, age 50, was driving a Jeep Wrangler that day, which suddenly veered off Pacific Coast Highway on a Monday afternoon and flipped down an embankment covered with boulders, toward the ocean. The Jeep landed on its roof, and Ryan was declared dead as the result of severe head trauma, according to the California Highway Patrol.

Rescuers were unable to remove the body from the destroyed vehicle

Investigators determined his death was accidental. (photo by TMZ)

In January of the same year, Ryan became the subject of much medical criticism when actress Heidi Montag stated in an interview that the doctor had performed 10 cosmetic surgeries on her in a single, one-day surgery. The operations included liposuction, nose work and breast implants and more.

When asked by reporters whether such extensive plastic surgery work in one session was safe, Ryan said, “My first concern is for the safety of the patient, so I would never push the envelope. Heidi’s a young, healthy girl; she was cleared medically. It was well within the realm of safety.”

Dr Frank Ryan and Heidi


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s